#364 The Look Back

   Since tomorrow's the last day of 2017, I figured I might as well go over some highs and lows with you, kind of a look back on all the things that happened during the year. As most of you know, 2017 has been mostly crap, so I'll start with the negatives and end with the positives. Also, enjoy these pictures from throughout the year.
   In January, Trump was welcomed into the White House. This president, with historically low approval rates, kind of marked the beginning of what would become the horror show of 2017. With discussions of net neutrality in the US, debates sparking regarding sexism and egalitarian issues all over the world with their beginning in allegations against well-known people in Hollywood. The world has suffered hurricanes, war, catastrophes, people have been forced to leave their homes because of all of these things and more. Debates about racism, sexism and social issues have been flaming up all over the world.
   Social justice issues and debates have become more prominent and important, and people have a larger freedom to discuss issues that were considered taboo only a few years ago. People started demanding representation for their respective social groups, which hopefully makes an impression in 2018. I have large hopes for the upcoming year, because it really can't become worse globally, unless it's the literal end of the world.
   On a more personal note, I have a lot of new, positive things in my life. I have found someone who cares as much for me as I do for him, and our relationship is blossoming. He's my biggest strenght when I need help, and I can live in certainty because I know I can trust him with anything and he'll always do his best to follow through. I have a new apartment to move into after New Years, and I can feel things looking up for me in the upcoming months, despite the fact that I will soon be overrun by a whole load of school work in January. I am, despite this, looking forward to January, because I sense that it will be a month of personal growth for me, and that it will make a lot of positive changes possible for me. It'll make me a better person to be under this pressure, which will shape me to handle my stress and balance my work and my social life in a way that actually works, instead of intense bursts of both.
   Despite all the things that have happened during this year that were negative, I also feel like they made me a stronger, happier person than I was before. I feel like I have literally grown an inch, I have made huge progress in many personal ways, and can honestly say I will be leaving 2017 a happier and stronger person than I entered it, which makes me feel so proud and blessed. I will enter a new year surrounded by strong, positive people who make an incredible impact on my life, I will become happier and stronger, and grow as a person, and I don't think there's anything more positive than that. I have so many things to work on, so many things to improve, evolve and I can't wait to see what will happen to my talents and interests in the new year. The fact that I will also celebrate the new year with my boyfriend, the person who matters so greatly to me, makes me even happier. I can't believe I get to start the new year with someone so amazing and compassionate.
   That being said, I will celebrate new years with Theo and, before anyone even thinks to ask, we will be celebrating safely, surrounded by people we know. I hope that all of you will do the same. Get the new year started the right way: surround yourself with friends and/or family, celebrate safely and have a really good time!
   I wish all of you a Happy New Year, and I hope this will be the fresh start I know some of you need. Make sure to make the most of this fine opportunity, and improve yourself in all the ways you can!

Happy New Year, everyone!

Day #360 Meeting the Relatives

   So today I travelled like 100 kilometres to meet some of my boyfriend's relatives, mostly his mother's siblings and his cousins, and I was really really nervous. However, I was pleasantly surprised (not that I hadn't expected them to be nice), but because I didn't need to be nervous at all, they were really kind and asked just the right amount of questions, although the same one's were repeated quite often, like what I study, what year and where I'm originally from.
   Both of us thought it was time for the other one to see the at least parts of the family, and it really was. I feel like I was welcome and they may have liked me quite a lot. It makes me feel so much better to know that not only his immeadiate family, but his relatives, also like you.
(Image source: Pinterest)

Holidays Exhaust Me

   Holidays really tire me out. Not because of the fact that I spend it with my family, anyone who knows me knows how much I love getting to spend time with them (especially since I moved away). It's because there are always things happening. Not that they're not all positive, but you know me: I need my alone time to relax, I need to take a break from everything to recharge my batteries. I kind of change between introvert and extrovert in that way; I love being around people, but then I also need short periods of time to be alone by myself to completely unwind. So it's not that I don't enjoy the holidays, there's just so much going on at the same time, every single day, and there's so much you want to do that you need to cram everything into the same few days before school starts again and you, in my case, have to travel back again.
   The 23rd was an interesting day, since I went to see my grandparents, my dad's godparents and a few of my friends to drop of gifts I had gotten for all three groups. I loved it. I loved seeing my friends again after such a long time, because though we keep contact, we rarely see eachother face to face and only talk through our phones, since most of them still live here. I spent a lot of time in my car travelling from place to place, and when I got home it was time for the Christmas tradition of brining the tree into the livingroom, something we've done on the evening of 23rd since we started living in this house. I also had the time for a short chat with my boyfriend via webcam, since we hadn't seen eachother for a few days.
   The 24th was spent with my family, which is also a tradition: that day is always spent at home with eachother, spending some quality time with the family and eating all the yummy holiday food.
I got excellent gifts, some of which was exactly what I wished for (a huge thank you to everyone who brought me presents, they're all greatly appreciated!), but most of it was things I really needed. I also enjoyed checking what my parent's and sibling's reactions were to the presents I had gotten them (my sister got a hoodie, my brother candy, my mother a bracelet and my dad also received candy), and they seemed really happy about them. Especially my sister, who actually wore the hoodie today, which was a really big compliment, because of course that meant that she liked it (although I knew she would, because sheäs really easy to shop for, meaning that I actually have quite a good chance to find something that she really enjoys). I'll be showing the gifts I got for Christmas in a vlog, as soon as I get the time to record one.
   Today was extra special, my relatives on my mother's side (not all of them of course, because our house wouldn't suffice for that kind of meeting, we have quite a large family), and Theo came to visit to meet those who were here. He was a bit nervous, because who wouldn't be, but he really seemed to get along well with them, which is good. I have a lot of hopes for our future, he seems to fit in well with our family, and get along with them. I especially enjoyed seeing my cousins, because there are two that I sort of grew up with, who were my best friends throughout my childhood, which I hadn't seen all year. Since we're all adults now, we're all really busy and everyone lives away from home, so there isn't really much time, especially since I'm usually on the other side of the country, and they're both all the way up here.
   Tomorrow, I'll be going to meet his relatives, as there is a bit of a meetup for his cousins on one side of the family, I'm both looking forward to it and feeling very nervous at the same time. I want them to like me, because when it comes to your partner, who wouldn't care about that sort of thing. But I'm really looking forward to it too, I feel like it's time for me to meet more of his relatives than just his immeadiate family.
   I also very much enjoyed some quality time with the family pets during the Christmas holiday, we have several cats and two kittens (seen in the picture is one of them, looking at my sister, who apparently looked surprisingly startling in her new hoodie today). I really miss having pets when I'm in the apartment, but I'm actually thinking of getting a cat, or a turtle. I've always wanted a turtle. I've found them fascinating, I think they're awesome. I'll keep you updated on my pet situation.

Silent Hill

   Rose and Christopher have adopted a daughter with some psychological issues. Sharon sleepwalks, and keeps having night terrors about a place she refers to as Silent Hill. She keeps getting worse, and Rose decides to take her to the place she dreams about, a ghost town abandoned decades ago due to a coal fire emerging beneath it, directly against her husbands wishes. However, as the two reach the city, they are forced to swerve to avoid hitting a young girl appearing in the middle of the road. Rose hits her head on the steering wheel, and when she wakes up, she notices her daughter's gone. Being followed by a police officer, Cybil, Rose gets arrested, but before they have the time to exit the city they are attacked by something non-human, forcing them to split up. Cybil, Rose and Sharon are up for the adventure of a lifetime when the secrets of the city are unearthed.
   Having never played one of the games, I wasn't sure what to expect from this horror movie. However, I was pleasantly surprised by it. Silent Hill is scary, more so the monsters (of which Pyramid Head is the clear favorite of mine, since the reason for his existence is so fascinating) in it than the actual plot and the movie itself. The film takes on several different themes: a mother's love for her child, religion gone fanatic, the supernatural and the dark side found inside every person if pushed too far. It also offers an intresting look into the minds of the witch hunters found throughout several decades of our history.
   If you haven't yet seen this iconic horror movie, I highly recommend that you do. It's nothing short of a masterpiece, and I think it's absolutely amazing!

Sinister 2

   Sinister 2 takes off where the last movie ended. A local Deputy has taken over the case, and is now burning down houses where the otherworldy creature has killed, to stop Bughuul's travels, but as he arrives to one such house, he realizes that someone has moved in. Courtney and her twin sons Dyland and Zach lives there now, and he cannot burn the house down. Fighting over custody with her abusive ex husband, Courtney is terrified of being found by him, and is actually found, but the young deputy manages to force away both police and Clint (the ex). However, as soon as he's not around, Clint returns, and takes both the boys and Courtney with him to his home, where the Bughuul can finally get to them...
   This American supernatural horror movie walks in the footsteps of the first movie; same monster, same deputy, and another character from the first movie re-appearing. The home movies continue to be a horrifying centre. It also keeps true to my point from my review from the first movie (once the Bughuul has appeared on the screen, it's not scary anymore), therefore not leaving any fright left in this movie for me. It is, however, a very good film, and if you don't agree with me on that particular Bughuul-concentrated point, I would recommend that you watch it.

Egalitarian

   I'm an Egalitarian (if you have somehow been living beneath a rock and don't know what it means, please google it or ask in the comments before assuming things). I believe in the radical idea that all humans should be equal and have equal rights no matter what culture they are, the color of their skin, their beliefs or their genders. I don't care if you're a woman or a man or something in between, African American or South Korean, atheist, buddhist or a christian. I think everyone (everyone!) should have the same rights as everyone else. There isn't a country in the world where women shouldn't be able to drive, where people shouldn't be allowed to follow any religion they want or their culture should be respected. (And of course, I despise the people who see the rise of a strong movement, like womanism and #blacklivesmatter, and coming back with things like meninism and #alllivesmatter. Let people talk about positive change, for God's sake!)
   Somehow, after the progress of feminism, giving women the right to vote, to work and to have a general say in a lot of countries, despite the abolition of the slave trade in the British colonies stopping 200 years ago and another thousand efforts to stop racism and prejudice all around the world, the thought of people having equal rights is still radical. Women and men should both have the right to vote, women should not be judged for not wanting children. Christians and Atheists should be able to practice their beliefs side by side with Muslims and Buddhists (I don't care what your beliefs are, you should always be able to respect those of others!).
   How can such an idea, that all people should be treated like people still be a radical idea? I just don't understand how the world can view this as such a drastic thing. It's 2017 for God's sake, isn't it time we start treating each other like humans?
   If I ever get the opportunity to improve the world (besides working towards a better environment, which I'll of course be doing) socially, economically and in the eyes of justice so that all of those who inhabit it. I want to improve my surroundings in every way that I can, even if it's as little as just a kind smile or as big as improving the current situation for several people around me. All I want to do is improve my surroundings for the better.
   However, I'm well aware that change doesn't happen overnight and it takes a lot of time, energy and engagement. The world has a lot of things to improve, and I believe that as part of that world, it is our duty to make the world around us better, brighter and happier for all of us.
(Image source: upper; Imgur, lower; Youtube)

Shamless

   A weird show to recommend around the holidays, Shameless portrays the lives of the members of a large family with six siblings. Living with the struggles of an abandoning mother and an alcholic father, the siblings get by by taking care of each other. They all have big dreams, planning for their future. My personal favorite is Lip (short for Philip), which reminds me a lot of myself. I have a lot of good things to say about the show, it's an amazing show. Note that this show is not for children (and I mean not for children!)
   The acting in this show is amazing, the family portraying a very realistic relationship between one another, not the "everyone loves everyone" crap that you see in older sitcoms. It's refreshing, it's fun and it's amazingly. hilarious. I was recommended this by my sister, and I never really took her ravings about the show seriously, but it really is amazing, and if you're reading this, sis, then I regret that I didn't take your advice sooner!
   I would highly recommend this to everyone above the age of 15, if you have the right kind of humor and love sitcoms, this is the right show for you!
(Picture credit: Shameless US)

Common Christmas Questions

1. How long did you believe in Santa? Embarrassingly long, like until I was about ten years old. I was a very gullible, childish child.
2. What did you wish for this year? A mixture of things... A vlog camera, a new backpack, some other smaller stuff, like new markers and a couple of books.
3. Where are you celebrating Christmas? I always, always celebrate Christmas at my parent's house, and I doubt that'll ever change. I'll still be visiting when I have my own kids some day, if I have any. But I'll never stop visiting my parents over the holidays.
4. Do you decorate the Christmas three? Yes, always. It's been a tradition in my family to dress it together.
5. What's your favorite Christmas movie? I'm not sure I have one... Not a big fan of Christmas movies, but maybe How the Grinch Stole Christmas.
6. One person you wish you could celebrate Christmas with, but you're not? Definetly my boyfriend. I miss him a lot, but it's still too early to celebrate it together. Besides, there will always be next year.
7. What's your favorite Christmas food? The ham, without question (says the pescetarian)
8. Do you sing Christmas songs? No. Never.
9. Best thing about Christmas? When I was a kid, it was the presents. But now, as a student who lives away from home, I of course have to say that the time off from school and getting to spend time at home with my family.
10. Winter: yes or no? Yes. Always yes.
(Image source: merry-christmas-hd-images)

Sinister

   A true crime author and his family moves into a house in a small town. Unknowing to his wife, he moves them into a house where horrific murders have occured, a family murdered on the property. Ellison (the husband) finds a case filled with old home movies in the attic, and as he watches them, odd things starts happening around the house. Their son's night terrors get worse, strange mist appears and their daughter starts talking about a girl that died in the house. As Ellison investigates further, he notices that there might be something horrific, and ancient, at work in their new home.
   This movie is horrifying... As long as the actual monster stays off the screen, as soon as the details about the character doing all the killing, the magic is broken, because other than a scary appearance, it does not really possess anything else. However, the movie itself is great. It's scary, it makes your nerves tingle and the characters are amazingly written. I'd recommend you watch it if you're into horror and especially the supernatural horror genre.

A Drastic Thought

It's such a drastic thought,
the idea of equal
after the past waves brought
we still need a sequel

It's still the strangest thing
to think we're the same
so here's what I wish to bring
change to the rules of our game

A chance to be commensurate
for humans to be just that
a way to shed the desolate
for hatred to fall flat

Taking A Break

   I have had a lot of things on my mind recently, as if stress has just sought me out from absolutely nothing, and I've been thinking about and doing everything else at the same time. I still have a lot of things to figure out, but in October I decided to take some time off in the end of the year, so that I can spend my Christmas break with concentrating on spending time with my family and friends instead of working my butt of on several projects. So for a while, until January, I'll not be blogging or posting videos on youtube.
   So in October, I started stockpiling blogposts and video materials, and today is the first day where I use piled materials. So as I take a break, you'll still get the same amount of material, the same kind and the same quality as usual. There won't be any updates of my current life though, as you might imagine, but you can still turn in for your daily dose of blog reading whenever you want and expect the same kind of stuff that's always here.
   I have had a lot of things to think about lately. A lot of classes, looking for a new apartment, working on my blog and several personal projects, still trying to maintain a social life... I just need a break, I need a moment to myself, a moment to spend with the people who care about me the most, I need a moment to clear my head, collect my thoughts so that I can come back with more creativity, more strenght and higher quality posts and videos for you guys. I'd love to get back to my old passion for writing, for creating, a passion that's dying whenever I get more and more stressed, like this fall. I have a lot of things to make up for, a lot of things to improve. I have a lot to work on.
   So as I take this little break, this little time for breathing and healing my mind after stressing for several months. I have a lot of things on my mind at the moment, and I have a lot of things to do that are too personal to share.
   As of the first of January, I'll be back, writing new posts every day. I'll still be updating my other social media while I'm gone, so if you want to follow along my life even as I take a break from blogging and youtube, you can follow my instagram and snapchat, which are listed beneath Other Social Media, found in the upper corner, or you can just click this link!
   I look forward to come back in January. Until then, have a great time, a great Christmas and an amazing Christmas break. I'll see you soon!
(Image source: Give a Girl a Blog)

Tropic Thunder

   Even though it's a famous movie and I've heard about it several times (the same goes for the actors in it, whom I've seen several times in other films), I've never actually watched Tropic Thunder. My boyfriend when hearing about this, said we had to watch it, and so we did. I was not disappointed, everything I heard about the movie was true.
   The satirical film starring Robert Downey Jr., Jack Black and Ben Stiller as wellknown actors, depicts the story of an action movie being made. However, as the shoot isn't going as planned, the director takes on drastic measures, sending the famous actors, along with the rookies (depicted by Jay Baruchel and Brandon T. Jackson) into the forests of Vietnam to experience the film "for real". After the movies director gets accidentally blown up by an old landmine, however, the actors soon face something much worse than being stranded in the forest surrounded by special effects, stumbling onto a thing completely different, evolving into something that can only be described as a bizarre series of comedic events.
   I greatly appreciated the movie, it was amazingly funny and I laughed quite a lot during the movie. It was great, the comedic timing perfected and the acting impeccable. I've always been a huge fan of Robert Downey Jr., and I will always be. He's an amazing actor, and I have nothing to complain about when it comes to his co-stars in this particular movie.
   I've also always enjoyed the work of Jack Black, since I was first introduced to his comedic appearances, and I still am.  I'm a big fan of his, for example, as you know by now, I love School of Rock. I've always found his acting to be amazing and his comedic timing as close to perfect as it gets, not to mention his facial expressions.
   The directory is flawless, the acting is perfected and the scenery the movie is shot in is beautiful and perfectly ideal for a movie of this kind. I have nothing to complain about, except that the movie's now over.
   So if you haven't still watched Tropic Thunder, making the same mistake I've made for twenty years now, I highly recommend you watch this movie. Especially if you're into the comedy genre, appreciate the kind of humor that is no longer politically correct, or appreciate any of the actors taking part in making the movie. I don't regret a single moment spent watching Tropic Thunder, and I never will. I might even watch it a couple of times more when I have a bit extra time.

Day #343 Geocaching

   Today we went out to geocache when the rain was finally stopping (but as we, me and Theo, left the apartment, we soon found out that the rain had begun again, so we had a total of 20 minutes without any rain today, look at those clouds above the church, they spoke for themselves). I still appreciated it (although when we turned back, there was actually quite the small storm going on around us with both wind and rain), because as I spent the rest of the day studying, and as most of you know, the human brain works better after a bit of exercise and some fresh air. I have my first exam this Tuesday, so it's really time to get to understanding my material. (If anyone's wondering, the exam is in linguistics.)
   I was introduced to geocaching quite some time ago, knowing what it is for several years, but I got into it when my boyfriend made me come along to find a couple of caches during the summer. I was surprised when it came to how much I enjoyed it, and now I've found around 150 caches (which should tell you I'm not very active, it goes in waves, just like all of my other interests) and have done so both when at my parent's house and here in town. I find it to be a really good way of getting exercise, and it's also very social and very fun. For example, when looking for one particular cache, me and Theo bumped into an old finnish couple who were also there, geocaching together. They were really kind and polite people.
   Also, when outside walking we found some adorable little ducks (which were surprisingly kind and curious about us, sometimes coming pretty close to us as we looked) which I, of course, took way to many pictures of. It was a bit of a highlight actually, I love all kinds of animals, and find birds particularly adorable and interesting.

Day #341

   Yesterday I realized that I have a new addiction: knitting, and everything that has to do with it. I mean, never let me enter the section with yarn at any supermarket, because I will spend all my money, and yours, buying yarn and new knitting needles. Here's a picture of part (note: part) of my current collection. If you're wondering what will be made from all of this: the black and white are going towards a pair of knee high socks, with a small white stripe (otherwise all black) and the other colors are going towards a scarf.

Look at these adorable colors!

   I haven't knitted or done anything within this category of creative work in so long, and I feel so great about getting started again. I'm already on the way towards a first sock, and it feels so great to be working with my hands again! I've also crocheted a few things, but nothing that I'm particularly proud of, however I seem to be more patient with my work now than when I first learned, and that's always a positive improvement. I've really missed this part of my creative self.
   Before anyone asks, no I don't know what got me started again. I think I just really, really missed knitting and working on something with my hands, and that's it. Also, I've always found it hard to find socks and mittens that I like in stores (in the past some of my realtives have supplied me with a multitude of mittens and socks (which are still in use, mind you, I just felt like adding something new to my collection) they've made themselves) and even, sometimes, when lookin on the internet. For some reason I have very particular taste when it comes to knitted socks and mittens, and store bought just won't cut it. Also, there's a certain, very specific, kind of satisfaction when making something with your hands. Any fellow knitter will agree that it's true. It provides a very unique peace of mind that you can't really get anywhere else, even if you decide to look for it.

   Also, if you don't knit or crochet: I really urge you to try. It's a very useful skill, and it's fun. It also gives you the ability to make things exactly the way you want them, and you don't have to stick with storebought clothes anymore. 

Day #342 Dried Pineapple

   Have you ever had something that you felt you could eat all the time, and never get tired of? Because I just found my thing that will never bore me: dried pineapple. I love dried fruits in general, but this fruit definetly takes the cake. I don't think I've ever fallen this quickly for a snack before, I could eat kilos of this stuff, and I'm not even joking.
   The only problem with this is that it's really expensive (at least when you're on a student budget, and every cent (cough, click on my stuff, cough) counts) even in smaller amounts, like a bag of 250 grams. So when I buy this, it has to last me for a while for it to actually be worth it, I can't just munch down an entire bag in two days. For example, the bag in the upper picture was bought tuesday, and I've forced myself to make it last (good on me for not binge eating anymore, right?
   I've also managed to get sick again (don't ask me how I do it, no one knows) as I had a fever yesterday. And in the middle of exam season! I've been more sick in my life, but it definetly adds to the stress. Hopefully, I manage to study enough for my exams, but if not, there's really no worries: you can take an exam 3 times, so I can always hope for better health after Christmas. However, I'm of course going to try my best even before Christmas, despite a bit of a fever and a spinning head when I stand up!
   A large hug to all of you reading, thank you for sticking with me despite the spotty blogging! I'm going to try to get back to my regular schedule again, as soon as I'm feeling better! Also, a special thank you to my friends who keep asking how I'm feeling and telling me to get well soon. You guys are the absolute best!

I Want Change

   I want change. I think most of the world do at this point in time. And yes, this will be a political posst, so it'll be really long. Stay with me.
   I want change. I want the politics to stop being dominated by men (in all countries, not just my own), I want everyone to be included in our justice and political systems. I want to have a gay president, a trans person as a president. I want everyone to be included and represented within every single one of our nations, and other's, systems. We are about to enter 2018, and for some reason we still refuse to have an equal system for every person. The civilized human race has existed for several thousand years, and it baffles me that we still don't have this figured out. All humans are equal. We are equal. How can we not have this figured out by now? Seriously, I want a reason.
   I want the reason for society being kept back in this way, I want the reason for some people not being included or even represented in our systems. I want the basis for the political system mostly recognizing men, and I want there to be a difference. I want to know the grounds for our system to be so twisted to enclude only the people that system realizes have the right to be included. Because this is wrong. Whether it's about countries where muslim is the main religion and there are no women represented in their government, or countries where there are no gay people in the government or in the justice system.
   We live in an age where we constantly advance, within almost every field recognized by humanity, and improve. Yet still we can't have an unbiased government or justice system. We can explore space, identify creatures from millions of years ago, but we can't handle the concept of being equal in the eyes of justice, politics and society. People are still racists, homo- and transfobes and just biggotts in general.
   I want change. I want to look at our society and be honestly able to view it as equal. I want to see that everyone's represented and know that they have a place. I want a world where people don't have to be afraid for their lives because of their social status, their sexuality, their gender or their religion. Where all those groups can view the others around them as completely equal. It'll be hard to accomplish, and it will take a lot of work, but when we get there, it'll be glorious.
   I want people from different nations view other nation's natives as equal, I wish for no one to be threatened by war or prejudice. I want no one to fear for their lives because of what they identify as, what they belive in or what they were born as. I want us to be equal, damn it! And I want it now.

Independence Day

   I have long since realized that independence means completely different things to different people. Ask one person, they answer independence is about paying your own bills, someone else says it's all about breaking free from your family or their norms. But today, we celebrate something completely else here in Finland, we celebrate our country becoming whole, united, our very own, for exactly one hundred years ago.
   We have been greated with amazing weather today, the sun is shining and still has a bit of warmth to her. The clouds that have covered Åbo for quite some time, has parted and shows us a beautiful skies. A thin layer of snow coats everything.
   We, me and Theo, have decided to celebrate small. We went for a walk during the morning, being completely blown away by the small amount of cars driving around. It was strange to see our streets so empty. We're going to watch Tuntematon Sotilas (The Unknown Soldier) during the afternoon, as it is a classic movie closely associated with the national holiday, and I've made some gingerbread dough (from scratch, points to me for that) for us to make cookies from when the movie's done. And that, is about it. We also listened to Finlandia this morning, and our national anthem.

   Me and my family never really celebrated our nations independence day either, just by doing small things like spending time together, and of course, watching the festivities at the castle of our President (although if I'm being completely honest, as I was younger, I mostly enjoyed it because the women arriving wore so pretty dresses), so not celebrating large is something I've grown accustomed to and I love it.
   It's a bit of a tradition to not celebrate large (like for example, in the US where they have fireworks and other extravagant things to honor their country's special day), but that doesn't mean we enjoy it any less.
   So congratulations on 100 years as a country, Finland! Let's hope for a great many more years in the future.

Change

   The amount of things that changes in a year is insane. Sometimes, nothing happens. You stay in the same place, the same people surround you, and nothing really changes. However, this year, a ton of stuff has changed for me.
   My looks has changed, for example. During autumn/winter last year, my hair was longer (and also this weird blue/silvery color), and I carried myself in a very different way, I stand up straight and I have a lot more muscles than last year. I also like how I look more than I did last year. It makes me feel a lot better about things about myself. Look at this picture, there's a lot of difference.
   Last year, I was surrounded by a lot of toxic people. I had a lot of people I met on a regular basis that made me feel worse about myself and didn't make me want to improve. That has changed, I'm now surrounded by positive people who support me, who makes me feel better about myself and encourage me to become a better person and improve my skills, work on my talents and acheive the things I want to. This is changing my whole outlook on a ton of things, especially the fields I have talent in, and I've arrived at the conclusion when I realize that I have more than one talent, which is completely thanks to the people around me.
   I've always been fascinated by the people surrounding you, and how they make an impact on your life. The difference can be positive, neautral or negative, and it depends completely on how you and the person approach eachother, how you communicate and what happens between you. No one else impacts it, not really. Humans are fascinating.
   I already know that next year will change a lot of things. I'm going to move, and next year I'm starting my third year of university. I'm also hoping that I'll be able to travel during the summer, and that I manage to evolve as a person during 2018.

Glöggrundan Day #333

   For those of you who don't know, here students at universities have overalls (which has specific colors depending on what you study, for example mine is green and white) that are worn to informal occasions like parties for students, gatherings etc. It's a tradition to have one, and I think it's a good one. Each student personalizes their overalls by filling them with patched related to organisations close to their heart, or patches that are related to specific events the student has visited. Sewing these patches is however really hard, since the overalls are made of a rough material, resulting in some students using glue instead of needle and thread, but that's by many older students considered cheating. The general idea is that the more patches you have, the cooler you are, and the older of a student you probably are as well.
   Every year we have something called Glöggrundan here in Åbo, which makes a point of visiting as many bars as possible in a night, for which you recieve a patch. You can reach different levels, each one with different patches. You also need to have the first patch to get the second, the first and second patch to reach the third "level" and so on.
   Glöggrundan was held Thursday, and I participated for the first time, making me reach the first level, Kandidat (the patches associated with this year are viewed here on the right). I'm really happy about this, because it's kind of a prestige thing as well: the higher level you are, the better, and I  hope to reach Magister next year. I didn't manage to get a ticket last year, since they sell incredibly fast, for a lot of students residing in Åbo, Helsingfors and Vasa joins us for this little adventure.
   Note that the point of this isn't just to get drunk: you can earn your patch through ordering alcohol free drinks/food as well, making the entire idea more inclusive and avoids putting pressure on someone who'd like to participate but doesn't like to drink.
   This year I walked around with a group of people my boyfriend put together, most of which I had already met. As always when you start with a large group and partying is involved, the group's members changed during the night as we split up, reformed, met other friends and lost some of the original ones. However, everyone made it to where they were supposed to sleep all in one piece. I had a lot of fun, it was really great to see these people again, they're all so incredibly nice. During the night I also ran into a bunch of other acquaintances in different groups and places, most of them also trying to earn their patches.
   The snowglobe and the yellow, green and black patch were earned this week, and since I had a few patches left to sew, I spent a large portion of yesterday evening with choosing places for them and using my very limited skill with needle and thread to fasten them.
   I'mm already looking forward to Glöggrundan next year, and of course to the next time I get to wear my overalls! Thank you to all of those who made this year such a great one!

I'm Learning a Lot About Myself

   This year I've been learning so much about myself, things I really didn't know I thought about, skills I didn't know I had and challanges I thought I would never be able to complete (yes, it's going to be a really, really long blog post, so if you're here for the shorter ones, this one isn't for you, but feel free to read anything else!)
   I realized I'm stronger mentally than I thought. I have experienced a lot of challenging things this year, in many different ways. I failed to find an apartment, I failed to get a job over the summer, I went through a breakup and a ton of other things. And I survived all of that. Now it's December, and all my challenges from 2017 are about to be over (and the 2018 challenges are going to take over), and I'm so proud that I made it through all of that.
   I also, quite recently, realized that I'm smarter than I thought (which says absolutely nothing, becaue I consider myself to be a colossal idiot), because I've tackled a lot of intellectual challenges this year. I've taken two exams on the same day and passed them both, I've made it through a lot of college classes and built more complex puzzles than I've ever done before. I've read a lot of books, and more complex ones. I've handled ton of things this year, most of them relating to intelligence and intellect.
   I started, in the beginning of the year, that I need to change how I approach my choices. I noticed that I often make choices based on what other people might think about what I do, how I act or what I decide. It's not healthy for me, as these choices made because of what other's want are often bad for me, or don't take what I want into consideration at all (which of course is not healhty, you don't have to be a genious to figure it out (even a colossal idiot can do it) ). Making choices based on other people is not really good for anyone, and I have a lot of improving to do on this point, even after realising it. Being a people pleaser is embedded into my nature, which makes it really hard to change, but I'm confident that I'll be able to do it. Maybe that'd be a good New Year's resolution for the upcoming year?
   I also realized that I should listen more, I have a tendency to just talk, talk and then talk some more, and I keep having to tell myself to actually listen to the people around me instead of just going on and on about all the time. You can do so much just by listening to the people around you. Giving advice can be just as helpful as just listening to someone telling you something. Listening shouldn't be optional in a conversation, it's should be your first priority and it took twenty years for me to realize it.
   I have a lot of other things that I've learned (for example that I can be really productive if I manage to focus, that I have a problem with keeping focused, that I have a real problem with my sweet tooth, and a ton of other stuff) but I won't bore you with every single one.
   I have a lot of changes to make before I can consider myself a better person, and I'm actually going to try to be better at the things I'm considering to be my flaws. I hope you've had some helpful realizations this year, and have a great December!
(Image source: upper; Pinterest, lower; also Pinterest)